For you have a relationship to everything…to your physical body, to your Self and others, to the service you give your community, world, even the universe, to Mother Earth and all the elements – including fire, water, earth and air, to all matter for that matter….“Without relationship you could not exist at all”.* 

And then, of course, there are the “intimate” relationships we have with…husband, wife, partner, lover, family, close friends. All the aforementioned relationships declared in the first paragraph are keenly important. However, to me, these “intimate” relationships are the most compelling ones we engage in – for they tend to play upon our Well Being more directly.

What do I mean when I say this? Human Relationships must be established in a certain positive way in order for our consciousness to grow and evolve. A Healthy relationship requires us to first KNOW who we are (the old adage KNOW THYSELF), and next to relate to others in a clear, honest fashion so that one is truthful about ones needs and desires, and is COMMUNICATING these things freely! Without this communication, to Self and others, one unconsciously begins to “tolerate” unwanted situations and behaviors.

In the Abraham Hicks teachings they discuss the premise between tolerating and allowing. Tolerating means putting your attention on another’s unwanted behavior, and the result not only causes you negative emotion but also serves as an indicator of your not being in alignment with the Higher part of you.  On the other hand when you are in the Art of Allowing as they call it, you are deliberately choosing to place YOUR attention upon what is going to make YOU feel good…therefore aligning with your Higher Self. However, conscious, deliberate choosing of your focus and attention does not imply that you never communicate to another – especially in an honest, loving, and open way. In fact, in their teachings, they equally emphasize the distinction between having the power to influence rather than to control others. Influence comes when we are “clearly” in touch with who WE truly are. Then we not only find communication easy, and expressed in a loving manner, but also often without ever saying a word! Consequently, we end up with the power to inspire, and influence, through our example – and then no need to control in order to feel good.

These premises apply to ALL relationships. The amazing and wonderful thing about relationships, though, is that they allow us to have a POWERFUL mirror that reflects back to us our own unresolved places. Many of us KNOW this and it is only a reminder. Nonetheless, when we choose to interact with others and we do so with honesty and a clear awareness – then those places in ourselves that are not loving, not compassionate, another words not in alignment with our High Self and in the Art of Allowing – will come more clearly into our awareness through our feelings of being “rubbed the wrong way”…thereupon creating not only friction and uncomfortableness, but also potential pain in the physical body. 

So let’s cherish our relationships, use them as the tools they are, make them as healthy as possible through our own Self awareness, conscious choices, and honest, loving, communication.